How Relationships Can Change Your Personality
This article explores the psychological phenomenon where romantic partners begin to resemble each other over time, often referred to as the 'Michelangelo phenomenon.' It examines how relationships can fundamentally alter an individual's personality and social presence.
Why it matters
It provides insight into human behavior and the psychological mechanisms that drive personal growth and social interaction within long-term partnerships.
Ognen Teofilovski / Reuters August 22, 2026, 10:26 AM ET Share Save This is an edition of The Wonder Reader, a newsletter in which our editors recommend a set of stories to spark your curiosity and fill you with delight. Sign up here to get it every Saturday morning.
A few years ago, my colleague Faith Hill reported on what psychologists call the “Michelangelo phenomenon”: the idea that over time, romantic partners mold each other. “Some researchers have found that when that happens, the art tends to look conspicuously like the artist,” she wrote.
Researchers aren’t in agreement about why exactly people in relationships become more alike as time goes on. Couples might also just imagine that they’re becoming alike, Faith notes; we’d prefer to think that a long-term partner is developing in the same ways that we are, even if that’s not entirely true.
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